How to Survive Hurricane Florence: Shoot At It!

Hurricane Florence is bearing down on the East Coast, and one Facebook group thinks they know how to stop it. (Photo: NASA)

For the last six weeks Clay Martin has brought GunsAmerica readers solid advice for surviving in an urban setting, just the kind of info you might need in a hurricane catastrophe scenario.

Forget all that.

As Hurricane Florence makes landfall today on the East Coast, over 33,000 Facebook users have opted for a better idea. The event Shooting Guns At Hurricane Florence To Scare It Away has exploded in just a few days as over 100,000 people either committed to “going” or expressed interest.

“Get your guns and your umbrellas. And your umbrella-guns, and your beer, and your beer-guns, and your tiny umbrellas to keep your beer dry,” the event’s About section reads. “And join people from all along the East Coast in scaring away Hurricane Florence to protect our country from this foreign invader!”

While a line of 33,000 gun owners firing from the beaches of North Carolina sounds like the most epic pro-gun protest to date, the event is 100% satire.

The About section also includes a “Note” from the event’s coordinator, Ryan Stumpf: “Do not actually discharge firearms into the air. You could kill someone and you cannot frighten a hurricane. I can’t believe I actually have to write this.”

Hurricanes might be less afraid of firearms than this guy, but that hasn’t stopped event-goers from having a little fun while they hunker down for the storm. Below is just a small sample of memes posted in the last few hours.

But the winner for funniest post is probably Jon H. Goin II, who posted this video after the hurricane’s path moved south:

This isn’t the first time a Facebook event like this has formed just prior to a hurricane. Police in Florida issued a warning in 2017 after someone launched an event titled, “Shoot at Hurricane Irma.” Police tweeted a helpful graphic depicting the path of a bullet shot into a hurricane:

So far police in North Carolina appear better able to detect satire. No warnings have yet been issued.

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About the author: Jordan Michaels has been reviewing firearm-related products for over two years and enjoying them for much longer. With family in Canada, he’s seen first hand how quickly the right to self-defense can be stripped from law-abiding citizens. He escaped that statist paradise at a young age, married a sixth-generation Texan, and currently lives in Waco.

{ 15 comments… add one }
  • M C B September 16, 2018, 12:47 pm

    For heaven sakes what the hell was the writer and editor thinking of??? Not safe in anyway. As the hurrican approaches, the idiots that actually shoot the rounds will certainly cause death and damage to buildings when the rounds fall on inland areas. Also, those that shoot at the hurrican could be arrested for shooing guns in a public area. What the hell were you thinking of when you wrote and approved this garbage. This is not a resonsible gun owner site. You should be embarrassed of your selves. I will never take this site seriously again.

    • Trevor Teague September 18, 2018, 9:54 am

      You must’ve missed the part where they said it was satire…

  • ray September 15, 2018, 10:33 am

    I can’t believe someone wrote this article!
    And, it is harder to believe anyone published this article!!
    Every day we responsible gun owners are fighting for our rights. Articles such as this simply give the naysayers more verbal ammo in their attempts to limit, then prohibit out guns.
    Yes, I read the statement saying to not actually fire guns at the hurricane. Not good enough!

    Guns America — Please do not publish anymore stupid, worthless and potentially damaging articles such as this. And no, the entertainment value does not outweigh the potential ramifications and extra work we all now must do to keep our rights intact.
    Thank you.

    • Oaf September 15, 2018, 11:47 pm

      Only a dimwitted fool would actually take it seriously and not recognize it as sarcastic humor. Says a lot about you…..

  • Hubcap September 14, 2018, 10:24 pm

    Alcohol and guns don’t mix.

  • Tim September 14, 2018, 5:15 pm

    Anyone who thinks this garbage is satire, funny or in any way appropriate is the one that is missing the point.
    I’m sure you would be one of the first to complain if your rights were stripped away because of this or any other “funny” idea on social media.
    GROW UP and act like you appreciate the rights you have in this country.

  • Ken Cross September 14, 2018, 11:13 am

    A great idea comes to mind as I read this article. They should turn this event page into a nation wide shooting tournament at local shooting ranges to raise relief funds for those impacted by hurricane Florence. This would be a positive influence the shooting community can have with the public. The anti-gunners heads would spin off their shoulders.

    I’m sure manufacturers in the industry could step up with some outstanding prizes.

  • Max Rambow September 14, 2018, 11:10 am

    Considering all the heavy metals already injected into this storm to make it do what it’s doing, it would be self defense to shoot those responsible, but I’m sure the powers that be wouldn’t see it that way.

  • chris September 14, 2018, 9:41 am

    It is hard to maintain an image of “Responsible Gun Ownership” as it is. Then having someone think that this is in any way a cute thing to say really demonstrates how some people can’t think ahead of how the general public is going to view such a comment. Satire can bite you in the butt now days. Totally irresponsible idea as gun grabbers can use this post to show just how irresponsible gun owners are instead. Just plain Stupid. There are idiots out their with guns who will do just what was said here. Duh!

    • lascmax September 14, 2018, 11:19 am

      In the immortal words of Warren Oates, “Lighten up, Francis…”

  • Al September 14, 2018, 9:22 am

    Dear God, why me?
    I mean, did you really have to saddle me with ‘brothers’ who just can’t seem to use their head for anything more than keeping their ears apart?
    *groan*!!!!!!!!!!

  • Dr Motown September 14, 2018, 9:09 am

    But my ballistic calculator won’t compute 96mph cross winds! LOL

  • Buck September 14, 2018, 6:05 am

    For many years outdoors men have said guns and acohal do not mix and they don’t this is not pro gun but anti gun. . Done by anti gunners and people who don’t own guns.
    Stay away from the coast don’t take beer don’t shoot in the air . Buck a Christian a 100% disabled Vietnam veteran lifetime member NRA .

    • Missed the Point... September 14, 2018, 9:22 am

      Apparently Buck can’t identify satire, even when it is called out as such.

      • Tenbones September 14, 2018, 4:23 pm

        In light of the leftist moonbats coming out and claiming Trump is complicit in the formation of this hurricane, I’m not sure satire even exists anymore.

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