Kathy Griffin should be shot and killed. No, not just for her recent “joke,” you know the one where she is pictured holding a decapitated Trump head covered in blood. Griffin should also be shot and killed because she’s a no talent, unfunny Loser.
Seriously, there’s not one thing she’s ever done that was funny. Not one. An argument can be made for her appearance on Seinfeld, but only because she played a character who was a facsimile of her real self. Basically, a super annoying Loser. Did I mention she’s a loser who adds zero value to society? We’re talking “Loser” with a capital “L.”
Okay, I’m joking. I don’t believe Kathy Griffin should be shot and killed. Shot. Maybe. Killed. Probably not.
Okay, I’m joking again. Griffin shouldn’t be shot nor killed. She should probably just disappear. For clarity, not “disappear” as in “die” — at the hand of government jackboots who abduct her in the middle of the night, throw her in a burlap sack, beat her bloody with telescoping batons and toss her convulsing carcass over a bridge into a dark river — but “disappear” for like a few months until this blows over.
Oh no. I just realized that what I said probably went too far. It wasn’t funny. I crossed the line, I think. But I’m a writer, you know. I cross the line every now and again. Heck, I move the line. And sometimes I just piss all over the line. I get it, though. It’s not funny and it offends people.
I ask your forgiveness. Will you forgive me? Ms. Griffin, will you forgive me too? I’ll retract what I’ve written, even though since it’s already been published it’ll probably live on the Internet forever (just like that Trump photo Griffin told the photographer to “take down,” as if that’ll work in this day and age).
Geez. What disaster. I shouldn’t have said what I said even though I knew it would cause a shitstorm. But I did it anyways because I kinda wanted to cause a shitstorm. I just didn’t think the shitstorm would be so big and I would be the subject of such intense scrutiny.
Okay, for the readers who don’t understand sarcasm, what I did in the text above was I mimicked Griffin’s situation. I made a stupid joke that was intentionally outrageous and purposely designed to cause a shitstorm and then apologized for doing it even though, again, I knew it was a stupid, shitstorm-inducing joke. BTW, my satirical approach did cause a shitstorm. Just check out the irate comments on the GA Facebook page from all the folks who just read the headline and not the entire article.
How do I really feel about this story? It’s a non-story. Griffin messed up. She immediately apologized. It appears she meant it.
But even if she didn’t, she’s a self-admitted “D-lister,” who the hell cares what she has to say about anything? Let’s move on and talk about some important stuff: debt reduction, fixing Obamacare, immigration reform, passing the Hearing Protection Act and National Concealed Carry Reciprocity.
We need to stay focused on the issues that matter. We need to stop getting distracted by irrelevant nonsense that the media plays up, ad nauseam, to get ratings on a slow news day in June.
And, for the record, Griffin, you’re not a total Loser with a capital “L.” You do have some funny material. There’s no need to resort to decapitated Trump heads to get a laugh from your liberal pals. You’re better than that. Save that act for Bill Maher.